MMMmmmm lets talk a little Eros, erotic love. I read this:
“Romance is not in my repertoire, Eva. But 1000 ways to make you come is. Let me show you.” (Quote from Sylvia Day’s erotic novel “Bared to you”)
Let me tell you how that makes me feel… all tingly inside. But continuing with our discussion, its only obvious that sex, even if it’s toe-curling, lip-biting, sheet-grabbing, orgasmic, mind-blowing sex… it does not equate to REAL LOVE. If you have the life-altering experience of that kind of sex, it SHOULD change you, it’s designed that way. Sex is a very powerful thing, just ask any Connoisseur of sex whose skills in the Art of Love-making create addicts. We won’t go into how they seek vulnerable people to self-medicate their own brokenness, for now.
Sex, however good or not, was designed to transform two people, into one. It was originally intended to be the glue of a life-partnership. So yeah, good sex, is addictive. Let me say this… I wish people that have no interest in committed relationships would stop calling sex “love-making” because their purpose is to “get off” not create love. And it’s that type of spirit that has reduced the beautiful, intimate and romantic act of “life-locking” into this common-place extraction of endorphins. Sex has become a social drug and “pushers,” (those who exchange without feelings) find the obsession of others both a blessing and a curse… depending on the situation. I feel the same way about them that I do pan-handlers and addicts begging on the street for money (I am not a fan.) I guess it matters because I want to straighten something out… and that’s how males and females handle “casual sex” differently.
You see although I don’t have an inside tract on how males feel, I think females have a harder time getting over “just sex.” The first time is memorable for mostly everyone but for the most part, dudes can just go home and wash away the experience with a shower. Why it’s different for females is that when a male enters her womb, a secret space (a sort of Pandora's box) – the center of her being a spiritual door is opened, a connection is made, and a piece of him/them stays even after the physical person leaves. If it was mind-blowing great sex, she’ll crave it from him again, and again and again. But the part I don’t want you to miss is ITS A SPIRITUAL CONNECTION. Whether she agrees to a “no strings attached” kinda thing – the war still rages on internally (emotionally, physically, intellectually.) Sure, people can turn it all off, or purposely stop the wanting… but the fact remains every time sex happens a little DNA is left behind (learned that in the Sex Education class in school.) Because “everybody is doing it” (seemingly) its an anomaly to be an old virgin. And so the only way to stifle the emotional connection is to desensitize, which you must do in order to have multiple sexual partners. SMH
Don’t get me wrong, I love sex. It does a body good. If it’s done right… there are no words that can express how it can make a person feel. And everybody wants to wanted, to be doted on, to be the object of a healthy obsession... but for real for real, most people just want to be loved. The problem is, people nowadays seem to lack the capacity for committed long-term relationships. The throw away Cancel Culture is killing us. How do you have REAL LOVE where there isn’t REAL commitment and staying power? I get it, people want to be free to do what feels good… yes by all means be sexually freee… express yourself, give and take to your hearts desire, if that make you happy. I’m just saying use it responsibly. Have some morals about yourself. I’m just saying if you’re gonna reach out and touch someone like that, at least be honest and care, for real. But if you want REAL and LASTING LOVE, you gotta go deeper than that.
For more pillow talk, check back next week.