Ever wish you could pick up a universal remote like Adam Sandler in Click (Sony Pictures, 2006) and just fast forward through the sucky times in your life? And I’ve had a lot of those., in fact it was most of my kids childhood. If not for their love, laughter, little personalities and hugs and kisses, I might’ve fallen off of reality altogether. I hated life because I was lonely and I was really angry with God, I’m saying this OUT LOUD because most people feel a certain kind of way when they don’t get answers to their prayers. But instead of  ADMITTING where they are they transfer their faith in God to SELF or others.

Honestly I felt like I would just EXPLODE if God didn’t come through for me. But I carried on, living because I had to… but I was in survival mode a very long time. Every Sunday I showed up to church wearing the “Churchface.” I sang, praised and served AND told everyone who asked, “I’m blessed,” smiling on the inside but crying on the inside. My tribe (Christian brothers, sisters and friends) were instrumental in pulling me out of that dark place. I couldn’t have made it without them.  

But to be desperately unfulfilled (and seemingly forgotten or ignored) is a terrible place to be… and it’s where most people are when they turn away from religion and give up on God. They say… “I’ve tried religion and prayer and they don’t work.” If you’ve been there let me ask you, “Did you have a RELATIONSHIP with God?” Or did you get caught up into the rules and Thou Shalt Nots of organized RELIGION? Did you hear about this dude who did miracles and walked on water or did you actually meet Him for yourself? Ah, now that’s something different, isn’t it? You see when you have a relationship with people you must spend time, talk, and share experiences (aka you get to know them.) You see, that’s what the Christian (Christ follower) lifestyle is all about… not RELIGION (a system of rules and conducts one must follow to be righteous “in good” with God. So prayer is basically communication with God, not to the universe or “whoever is listening.” Its an intentional, focused, and directed conversation. And a conversation involves at least 2 people, an exchange - giving AND receiving - talking AND LISTENING.

Imagine your best friend coming up to you, balling their eyes out as they beg for your help and as soon as they say what they must, they turn around and walk away before you could respond. That would be a little weird right? Well that’s exactly how lots of people pray. It’s all about them … I have to say it, God is not a celestrial Santa Claus, He’s a good & loving father who wants to be connected to His children. And like any good father does, He wants the best for His kids. So that means He ain’t gonna give you EVERYTHING you ask for when and how you want it, especially if it would hurt you or someone else. And that never made sense to me until my own prayer of marrying my man dissolved. But you see only God knew that he would never hold down a steady job, or that he would become chronically irresponsible and a meth addict.

The hardest part about prayers is the waiting.  God answers prayers in 3 different ways, “Yes,” “Wait,” or I have BETTER.”  That means some answers come quickly but most times… answers are suuuuuuuper slowwwwww.  It’s because we are not ready to receive what we’re asking for, even tho we think we are. Waiting and waiting with no satisfaction does make the heart sick. We become frustrated, angry and then bitter.  But our habit of doing all the talking we eventually wonder if there is anyone on the other end. AND in our failure to listen we misconstrue the “wait” or “I’ve got better” for a “NO.” And that place right there opens the door to receive messages like “No body’s coming” and “God ain’t real.” By the way, they didn’t come from God! Are you trackin’ wit me or did I go to deep for ya?

So if you pray, 1) Know who you’re praying to. To get God’s attention you have to believe in Him, 2) Get you a relationship with Him, 3) Then have a 2-way conversation #speak/listen, 3) Be willing to wait on your answer, 4) Trust that God cannot lie and He will come through and 5) Be thankful before your answer comes. And walk as if you already have what you’ve asked for.